POURQUOI LA LANGUE FRANÇAISE EST CHIANTE | DamonAndJo
November 5, 2019
Hey everyone, it’s Damon and it’s not Jo because Jo is in New York right now and I am in Paris Fortunately So, this channel is American but we speak many languages one of these languages is French when we do succeed speaking it We hear a lot of things about the French language that it’s a beautiful language that it sounds really romantic but I think that it’s a… what’s the word again? unbearable! and a pain in the ass for the people who are learning to speak French The French language is pretty hard for someone who is not too smart I’m joking Even after 10 years of studying it there are still things that annoy me Here are these things The “Passé Composé” Did you know that there are 17 verbs that go with “être” (to be) in the “Passé Composé” So you can’t say: “J’ai arrivé, j’ai allé ” (I arrived, I went) because these verbs have to be used with “être”(to be) So you have to say: “Je suis allé” “Je suis arrivé” “Je suis mort” (I am dead) after studying the French language Here are the 17 verbs that I learned from a song Arriver, aller, venu, passer devenu, revenu, rentrer, entrer descendu, retourner, rester, monter sortir, partir, tomber, né, mort If you have a verb in the “Passé Composé” used with “être” (to be) you need to add the E’s and the S’s depending on whether the subject(s)you are talking about feminine or plural subjects for the pronunciation, nothing changes unless there is a consonant at the end like: “Je suis mort, je suis morte” and then there are verbs in the “Passé Composé” that we use with both the auxiliaries “J’ai passé l’examen” “Je suis passé devant la bibliothèque” and that’s not even the end of it! and these verbs that need to be used with one of the auxiliaries only need to be used this way not only in the past but also when making hypothesis like for example “Si je serais allé à la fête..” (If I had gone to the party) ” je serais encore bourré dans cette vidéo” (I would still be drunk in this video) We just used “être” (to be) instead of “avoir” (to have) but we’re not talking about the past here, but about a hypothesis So this thing with the past and the 17 verbs that are used with “être” (to be) is so annoying There are way too many rules and it takes a long time to learn The numbers 70, 80 and 90 don’t exist in French I talk about this all the time on this channel If you really look at the word “soixante-dix” it’s not a word, it’s a math problem “soixante-dix”: 60 + 10=70 “quatre-vingt”: 4 x 20=80 “quatre-vingt-neuf”: 4 x 20 + 9=89 So for us, when we see that, we see a multiplication not a number but you, that have been studying it since you were young don’t even know that it’s actually an addition you don’t even notice that you have to multiply numbers because it’s just the number you’ve learned ah yeah, yeah and after all that there’s the pronunciation but you have words that are almost impossible to pronounce Yesterday night, I was on Des Martyrs Street right next to Montmartre I passed by a cemetery where there were a lot of dead people (morts) maybe because of a murder (meurtre) See, I don’t understand how a language that beautiful that romantic and so like… ok no, let’s not exaggerate too much so smooth can also include sounds like that: I really want to know who said Ah we won’t say meurtre, we’ll say meuRTRe no, no, no, Montmartre Montmartre Words with R’s, words with U’s and then there are words with R’s and U’s Serrurerie, fourrure So I can get by pretty well here Paris in French and I can say whatever I want, I can express myself but from the moment they say a word with R’s or U’s I’m done, I’m just another American here Dumb American On, under, over, underneath If “sous” means under and “sur” means over, on top that means “au-dessous” is underneath and “au-dessus” is on top and then there’s “déçu” I am disappointed in your French Damon I always mix them up I don’t know why “retourner” I thought it was return “rentrer” to go back and “revenir” to come back So um, should be pretty simple right? but apparently, when I use it, I always have a hard time maybe you have already noticed that in our videos and if you didn’t, maybe that’s because you are not subscribed and if you are not subscribed, you need to subscribe Freaking reflexive verbs I go to Paris, I come back every year (années? ans?) “ans” and “années”?! Oh my god When there is a direct object that you put in the beginning of a sentence before the verb, you need to add an E or ES or an S For example, you would say: “J’ai mangé une pomme” (I ate an apple) but, you would say: ” La pomme que j’ai mangée” (the apple that I ate) you’re gonna add an E at the end but sometimes, it changes the pronunciation Ah yeah, “J’écris beaucoup de lettres” (I write a lot of letters) “Les lettres que j’ai écrites..” (the letters I wrote) you need to add ES because the order changed, it’s not “J’ai écrit” anymore You need to know “lettre” (letter) is feminine and that now it’s the letters, so it’s feminine plural You need to know the “Passé composé” for “J’ai écrit” (I wrote) “Écrire” (to write) is an irregular verb You need to add the ES and you need to do all of that in a millisecond because if not, you’re done. The waiter is going to talk to you in English “Ah if you want I can switch to English” Bitch Ah, but you remember what I’ve said before You need to add E’s and S’s but only if it’s used with “être” (to be) Now, it’s a sentence with “avoir” (to have) “Les lettres que j’ai écrites” (The letters I wrote) “j’ai écrites” is used with “avoir” (to have) The rule changes sometimes so we’re gonna add E’s and S’s to the verb “avoir” (to have) too but in some other case I am leaving, I am leaving France, I am done with the French language and my tongue is broken too saying all of this “Je veux du lait” after studying French for 10 years I don’t even know what that means Is it I want milk or I want some milk? In French I guess it doesn’t matter I am talking about the same milk but in some cases it changes from “du” to “de” You say: “Il n’y a pas de lait” when saying there is no milk because it’s a negative construction apparently and I can’t remember what I was gonna say with all of that ok next! I am talking to a friend who is on holidays and he’s gonna come back to Paris “rentrer à Paris, retourner à Paris” ??? and I want to tell him when you’re back here, let’s go get a coffee “Quand tu seras ici, on prendra un café” “Quand tu seras ici, on prend un café” “Quand tu es ici, on prend un café” “Quand tu es ici, on prendra un café”??? I give up! and to continue with the things that annoy me in French Good, well, bad, badly “bien” is normally an adverb so it goes with the verbs “Tu chantes bien” (You sing well) “Je danse bien” (I dance well) but sometimes, you use it with nouns too “Ah, il était bien le film?” (Ah the movie was good) Isn’t it “Il était bon le film”? The movie is good “Ah ouais, le musée il est bien?” (Ah yeah, the museum is good?) Shouldn’t it be “est bon” instead? It’s an adjective with a noun It’s a good museum “bien” is an adverb, well that what I thought but if we talk about food, you are gonna say “bon” “Ah c’est bon le plat” (Ah this meal is good) “L’hamburger, c’est bon non?” (The hamburger is good right?) Why did it just change to “bon” now? and just to add to this, there is this other thing that is kind of connected “C’est beau la ville non?” (The city is beautiful, isn’t it?) No, because “ville” (city) is “belle”(beautiful- feminine) so I don’t understand why you just said “C’est beau la ville” when it should be “c’est belle la ville” (feminine form) ok, so the french language is not that hard to learn I don’t think It’s true that even after studying it for 10 years there are a lot of little things like that I still have difficulty to pronounce I have a hard time understanding, why they did that and I also know English is like the worst language Jo has her own little difficulties in French Normally, we’ve got the same ones I’m talking as if she was there, she’s in New York right now ok? We’ll see you in the next French Friday! Actually, we’ll see you Sunday and Tuesday because we make videos, 3 videos per week I need to go edit Kisses Ciao, ciao! but sometimes it changes the proun… wow yeah, pronuncia… but sometimes it changes the pronunciat…ion sometimes it changes the pronunciation because, because what…? It’s been almost 10 years that I speak French?! Wow! and my French is still like this?