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How to Communicate Effectively With People? | Jeffrey Allen


All right, so how many of you have met somebody
really cool so far at Awesomenss Fest? Yeah, all right, all right. And how many of you want to meet some more
cool people at Awesomenss Fest? Yeah, easy, right? Because when you look around you, these are
the cool people. This is what you want to do. Now, there’s a little a challenge that you
go through in an environment like this. We’ve got so many good people to connect with. And the challenge is first, how do you attract
the right people? And here, it’s a little bit easier because
everybody is the right person. But what I mean is how do you attract the
right person for you right now? You know, you’ve come here to meet particular
people, whether you know it or not, and how do you kind of put that signal out and attract
those people? The second challenge is really when you do
that, when you meet that person, how do you connect with them really deeply? How do you get past kind of the small talk
and the, you know, the chitchat and really get in and connect with them in a deep way? And for both of these challenges, I would
say there’s really just one solution. And for me, that solution is learning to use
your energy. Now, when I say learn to use your energy,
that might sound a little funny to some of you, so let me explain what I’m talking about. If I say hand, most people think kind of like
this, you think like a physical hand. And we’re used to looking at the world in
these physical terms of things we can touch and feel and take pictures of and so on. But a few of us are lucky enough to look at
the world and see what you see on the right. So when I see hand, I think more about energy,
I see the physical part of the body and I see the energy around the body too. And if this seems a little strange to you,
I can totally understand, because in 1990, I was just finishing up a double bachelor’s
in computer science and mathematics, and I was working for the Department of Energy and
the working for the government doing research, and I started seeing energy. And I don’t mean like Department of Energy
kind of energy. I mean, I started seeing auras, right? I started seeing light around people and I
started having kind of shared dream experiences and I started knowing things that there’s
no way that I could know them, I didn’t have any background or information on. And you know, being kind of scientific minded,
first I… You know, first I thought, “Wow, this is really
cool. You know, my superpowers are coming in.” And then I thought, “Wow, this is really scary
because everybody’s going to think I’m nuts,” right? And so I did probably what…you know, I did
the smart thing which is I didn’t really tell anybody what was going on with me. And I started to go into my career. I spent 15 years as a software engineer. But during that time, you know, during the
day, I was an engineer, but at night, I was studying everything I could find about energy. So I was reading books. I was watching, you know, videos. I was seeking out the best teachers that knew
how to sense energy and feel energy and asking them, “How do you do that? How can you teach me to do it more,” because
at the time it was very spontaneous. It just kind of happened sometimes, but I
didn’t know how to turn it on all the time. So this went on for a long time, 15 years
as an engineer, kind of hiding out, you know, not telling people what I did. And then 10 years ago, I decided to kind of
stop doing that smart thing. I decided to stop hiding it from the world,
and I said, “I’m going to do something a little different. I’m going to try to just go out and teach
everything I’ve learned. And I moved to Sedona, Arizona, because that’s
where a lot of people like me hang out, and you know, a little bit easier to come out
in Sedona. But it was…this was a new business. I didn’t have any capital to start it. The tech bubble had just burst and I’d lost
my $1.3 million worth of tech stock was gone, you know, worth zero, and so I was thinking,
“How am I going to start this business?” And the one thing I did have going for me
is that I understand energy and I can see energy. So I started to just follow that and I’m going
to teach you a few techniques to use it yourself, but what happened was over the years, I was
able to build a very good business, build a six-figure business, without using any kind
of traditional techniques. And what I was doing was just looking at how
do I connect with people energetically and how do I send that message out, kind of, you
know, through the ether and reach people this way. And it’s very, very powerful. Now, what I learned in these 10 years of teaching
is that, at first, using energy is extremely useful. So there’s no area that I can think of that
you can’t apply energy work. So if you’ve got something in your health,
or something in your relationship, or something in your career, definitely you want to take
the physical actions to make things happen, but if you take the energy actions too, you
notice things happen faster and easier. So it’s basically what you’re doing is you’re
kind of lining up with the flow of energy that’s already there and then your physical
actions are following that flow of energy. So you end up being a lot more efficient. You don’t have to do all the things that you
don’t need to do. You just do kind of the, you know, the lazy
approach, the things that’ll take you there faster. Now the second thing I learned is that everybody
can learn about energy. And it seems a little bit funny, that I was
seeing energy, but I’ve trained thousands of people and I haven’t found anybody yet
they can’t learn. So with a little bit of practice and some
some feedback where you can know if you’re getting it right or wrong, you can learn to
see energy and feel energy and listen to energy, and some people can smell energy. And it’s, you know, it’s something that’s
actually pretty normal and you’re probably doing it already, even if you don’t know. So I also learned that we only learn through
experience. So you know, I believe the things I believe
about energy in the world and how to kind of, you know, bend reality a little bit, I
believe those because I’ve had a lot of experiences working with energy. But if you don’t have an experience, if you
just listen to a story of somebody else, like me telling my story, it doesn’t really mean
as much to you as if you get an experience yourself. And that’s what I want to give you today is
a little taste, a little experience with energy work. And so I picked the thing that I thought was
the most, you know, most important here, which is again how to connect with people, how to
get them to come to you and then how to really communicate well when that happens. So when you’re looking at how to attract the
right people, it’s actually pretty simple. It’s just three little steps. First thing you’re going to do is you’re going
to focus on your message or your intention that you want to send to those people. Now this might be something really simple,
like in here, I might just say, “I’m Jeffrey Allen and I want to connect with people that
have like innovative applications for energy work.” So maybe that’s my intention. But you could have a bigger intention too. If I’m launching a new product, I’m going
to say, “My intention is to connect with all the people in the country I’m targeting and
offer them this product and get them to come and, you know, meet me wherever I am.” And once you have this message down, your
second part is you need to somehow connect with all these people. And I’m going to teach you a little energy
trick for doing that. And then once you’ve connected, of course,
then you want to deliver your message. And I’ll just show you kind of how this looks
in energy and I like to draw this as cartoons because if you can see energy, I know it doesn’t
look quite like the physical world, and if I draw a cartoon, you’re not going to take
me too seriously. So the first thing you want to do is this
focus step. And for that, what you’re going to do is you’re
just going to imagine you’re bringing your energy your attention right around your body. And so I’m talking, you can just kind of practice
this step right now, so just kind of draw your energy back and feel it around you. The second step where you’re going to connect,
and this is a little fun, is what you’re going to do is you need to expand yourself to the
size of the audience you’re trying to reach. So in the exercise today, I want you to do
just the connection exercise of how do I meet the right people right now. So today, for the rest of the day at A-fest,
how do I attract the people that are just the perfect people for me? And so for that size group, you just need
to expand your awareness or your reach to about the size of this room. So an easy way to do that is to just imagine
yourself kind of up at the top of the room, like up here, and you’ve got this 360-degree
reach where you can kind of see all the people that you want to reach. Now you could do this for a whole country
too. You could be above a country or above a, you
know, the entire world. Now, it’ll work that way too. Now, once you’ve done that, you’re just going
to deliver the message. So in this case, you’re going to just imagine
from, you know, kind of the top of your head, your crown chakra, that you’re sending that
message out to all the people in the room. And then you’re going to watch and see which
people light up, right, and you’ll just kind of notice little lights going on around the
room, like, “Ah, there’s…I saw five people light up that are the perfect person for me
right now.” Now, very simple exercise but you’re going
to notice that you’re going to have amazing results with this. And I’ll give you a couple examples. So for me, anytime I’m traveling somewhere,
I do this. I was moving into Japan to teach workshops,
and I went above Japan and kind of reached out to everybody and I said, “Hi, I’m Jeffrey
Allen and I’m going to teach about energy and it’s going to be in May and here’s the
company you can find me with.” And something really funny happened. When I got to Japan, on the break in my first
workshop, more than one student came up to me and said, “The reason I came to your workshop
was you appeared to me in this vision and I remember this curly-haired guy and you said
your name and you said you’re teaching about energy and about two weeks later, I opened
up the magazine and there’s your picture, and I knew I had to come to this workshop.” And I was surprised because people don’t usually
remember, but in Japan, they did. I also had a woman come over from… I was doing the same thing to get clients
when I was living in Sedona. I had a woman come from Europe and she said
the same thing. She actually said, “You…” She looked like kind of shocked when she saw
me and she said, “You showed up in my kitchen and you told me your name and that you lived
in Sedona and you’re doing healing work. And first you scared the crap out of me and…but
then I thought, I need to go see this guy.” And I told her, I said, “I don’t remember
going to your kitchen, but, you know, I do send that message out and, you know, I’m sorry
for startling you but I’m glad you came and found me in Sedona.” And so this really works. I want you to play with this today, but also
play with it in your business too. When you’re looking for people, do the energy
work because it’s very simple and it’s very effective. Okay, so your next step. So now that you know these people are going
to come to you, how do you get over the common challenges of kind of that awkward beginning
or that balance of talking in the middle or even that, you know, kind of graceful ending. And if you felt that kind of awkward energy,
you know that you can feel energy. So if you feel a little bit funny in a conversation,
you’re noticing, “Ah, something’s a little bit off,” and you’re feeling energy, so right
away, you know you can do it. And I want to give you kind of a more detailed
example of what it looks like when I see energy, right. So when you’re talking to somebody, this is
you, this is your chakras, you’ve got kind of like seven main communication channels
where you’re talking to people. You’ve got your spirit and your mind and your
communication and your heart and kind of your passion or your power and your body. And when you meet somebody, like they’re just
going to be kind of attracted and pulled to you, and what happens there is as soon as
you meet somebody, you start to connect usually right here. So your spirits start to say hello and this
is that feeling you get where you’re like, “Wow, I just…I don’t know why but I’m so
excited to meet you and I have to talk to you more,” and there’s this big kind of something
going on energetically, this is just your spirit saying hello. Now the next thing that happens is the bodies
start to say hello. And when the bodies say hello, it sounds a
little bit…it’s down here, you know, and it’s a little bit more like, “Hey, baby.” You know, this kind of energy. And again, this is normal. So if this lasts for more than five minutes,
then maybe you got something going on, right? But you know, if it’s just…if it’s happening
in the beginning, just assume this is normal, the bodies are saying hello. And then hopefully what happens next is you
start to connect deeper and deeper. And if you’re in a real deep conversation,
you’re going to see that all of your chakras start to connect, okay? And you’re going to talk on all these different
channels with people. And if you don’t do that, what you’ll see
is that, like if you’re just connected to yourself, you’re not actually reaching out
and connecting energetically with the person, is you’re going to seem a little bit aloof,
a little bit standoffish. And so then you just want to kind of imagine
that you’re connecting instead. The opposite can also happen where you’re
talking and you’re not connecting and then you’re going to see them, you know, pretty
self-centered. It’s all about me, I’m just talking, my energy’s
here. And again, if you feel that or you feel that
from somebody, you want to reach out and just imagine, you know, kind of visualize you’re
connecting with them. And this works fantastic. So when you do that, again, let’s assume that
you make this nice connection, you’re talking in all these different levels, and at some
point, the energy is going to start to kind of fade. The energy will start to fade out. The conversation starts to die. And you really want to follow that energy. So instead of trying to like hang on to the
conversation, that’s the time when you want to say, “Okay, it looks like it’s time to
wrap up. We’re still talking but there’s not much connection
happening. I want to move on to my next right person.” And when you do that, you want to have your
energy move back into this self-sufficient mode, so you’re still just kind of maintaining
your own energy rather than imagining that you’re talking to this other person. Now sometimes, that doesn’t happen. Sometimes what happens is the person leaves
and you’re still trying to like connect energetically with that person. And this is when you start to feel lonely
and you miss that person. And if this happens, again you just want to
remember to just draw the energy back to you and, you know, have your chakras in this self-sufficient
mode. And I’m teaching you this because this is
probably the easiest way I know to connect deeply and to kind of adjust when you’re in
these awkward situations. So let’s give it a try. You’ve basically got these two different modes,
that the connecting mode where you’re really connecting well with somebody and then you’ve
got this self-sufficient mode where you’re just by yourself and you’re feeling good and
confident. So I want you to all stand up right now. We’re going to try it out. So I want you to practice this. So this simple technique, even though you’re
just visualizing energy is very similar to how your energy is actually working in the
body. And if you visualize something that’s similar,
it’s much, much more effective. Okay, so congratulations, now you’re all official
energy workers. You’ve graduated and so you know how to use
your energy to attract people into your life and remember, you can do this on any scale. You can attract people from across the world
if you want. And I recommend you do it at least once a
day while you’re here so you really get to practice and see if it works out for you. And second, you’ve learned how to connect
really deeply with using your energy and not just your words. And this works remotely too, so you can talk
to people on Skype or over the phone and use the same connection. And I just want to leave you with one final
question which is if energy is this easy to use, just visualizing what you want, what
else can you do with your energy? So is there some place in your health or your
relationships or in your career where you can use energy to create a difference? Or maybe you just want to make a little more
fun in your life, how would you do that? How would you use energy? Because I’ve tried all of that and I can tell
you that here’s no limits. Everything is possible with energy. ♪ [music] ♪

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