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Communication Tips: How to Meet New People

Remember that feeling of the first day
at school. Didn’t know anybody. Or that first day
on the new job So much work. So awkward. Well most people experience the same
sensation of awkwardness and insecurity just around the notion of meeting new
people. It doesn’t have to be this way. In my line
of work, I experienced so many different levels of social anxiety that people have around speaking. So it doesn’t necessarily have to be
around public speaking, big podiums, massive presentations, TED Talks. It’s the idea that you can love sharing who you are with everyone you meet and by doing so your world
changes in pretty magical ways. So how do you do it? Well it’s pretty
simple first you need to start with the
intention that you want to do it. That you actually want to meet new
people because this idea of wanting sends a message of yes to the world. It
sends that message of hello I can’t wait to meet you. If you
are someone who is not me, it’s awkward. This idea that security anxiety is
shutting you off. It’s sending a message of don’t talk
to me. When we goof around with our phones all the time in line it sends a message don’t talk to me. So if you want to meet new people decide
that you’re ready to meet new people. Decide that you want to meet new people
and that energy of yes is literally going to attract people to
you, but where do you start. Well start with strangers. Start with a
very very simple exercise where you decide to connect with people
that you don’t know in very simple ways. Connecting with someone, by that I mean,
really engaging your eyes with their eyes and here’s how you begin.
You know if you hold the door with somebody When was the last time you actually looked in
their eyes while you did that? I mean maybe you sort of caught it out of your peripheral vision and you’re like hear let me get it for you. But now I want you to really look at them. Be
on an elevator and glance at the person next t you and be like hey how’s your day? What floor would you like? Simple things. Nothing. They don’t have to be your next BFF. You just want to engage with them and
really look, because that is the muscle that you’re exercising when you want to actually have a
conversation with someone you really do want to meet. Same muscle but you practice in Low stakes
situations. It can be as simple as really looking at
the bar East at Starbucks when you order your latte. Easy right? You can do this. Now next, if you want to take it a little
bit deeper you have to set your intention that you are going to meet somebody and engage
in an initial conversation. The stakes are getting a little bit
higher here so again you can be at a coffee shop and you can look around the room to
someone whose eyes you engage with and you can talk about something as simple
as the weather. You can talk about something you’re
noticing in the shared environment that you’re in. Very simple but let’s say even that idea
seems a little intimidating. Then I invite you to take a situation
where you’re going to attend and meet somebody. Let’s say a dinner out
for drinks or at a networking event because don’t we do this. We decide it’s
much easier to go with somebody than go with ourselves. So even if you
set your plans to meet somebody there challenge yourself to arrive 20 minutes early. You’re giving yourself 20 minutes to build a new muscle of
confidence in meeting new people. Right, it might be
a little bit awkward in beginning but everything is awkward when we start
something for the first time. So you can get over that part and commit to showing up. When you show
up, bring your good attitude, set your
intention to meet somebody, and start engaging in a very simple
conversation and see what happens. I am telling you the world is full of interesting, fabulous individuals who you
can help and who can obviously help you so the more that you
build this muscle you will find that it will bring you
amazing opportunities and experiences that you’ve never dreamed possible. Try
it this week and then let me know what your
experience is. I cannot wait to hear.

6 Replies to “Communication Tips: How to Meet New People”

  • Hi Alexa
    I've found your channel yesterday, and since then been exploring it, and gotta tell you I loved every video I've watched so far, and even shared already one on my Facebook page.
    Keep up the good work! 🙂
    I wish I had a sister/ friend like you.

  • We were just talking about this with my family yesterday and what a coincidence that I've found this video today! Very simple and easy to follow even though I felt like I was going to pass out while listening to you describe the different scenarios. I want to try experiment with these ideas this week to see if I can combat my fears.

  • Just by hearing the video, my mind become relaxed and my thoughts ordered to specific point.
    There is something special about you

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