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Communication Secrets – How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lownes (animated book summary) – Part 2

As I said in my previous video, communication
skills are a necessity in today’s society and are something everyone should learn. After all, 85 percent of one’s success in
life is directly due to communication skills. Connecting with other people brings infinite
rewards. Whether it’s landing the job, winning the
promotion or charming a new partner, other people are your greatest resource. In this video I’ll be sharing another five
techniques from the book “How to talk to anyone”. Let’s begin and take your conversation to
the next level. Technique number one: MATCH THEIR MOOD The first step in starting a conversation
without strangling it, is to match your listener’s mood, if only for a sentence or two. I’m sure you’ve suffered the aggression of
a mood mismatch. You’re late, rushing to a meeting, when a
colleague stops you and starts lazily narrating a long, boring story. Or maybe you have been feeling down when some
overexcited associate starts pounding you with questions. It’s not pleasant. Every mother knows, or at least should know,
that to quiet a crying child, she shouldn’t just shake her finger and shout “Quiet down”. No, moms pick their babies up. They cry sympathetically, matching baby’s
misery for a few moments. Then they gradually transition into a happy
sounds. Your listeners are all big babies! Match their mood if you want them to stop
crying, start buying, or otherwise come around to your way of thinking. So before opening your mouth take a voice
sample of your listener to detect their state of mind. If they are feeling down, be sympathetic with
them. If they are super excited, share their enthusiasm. So when your communication counts, match their
mood and voice tone, if only for a moment. Technique number two: PRESENT MUNDANE WITH PASSION It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it. Worried about your first words? Fear not, because 80 percent of your listener’s
impression has nothing to do with your words anyway. No matter how dull and mundane the text, an
empathetic mood, a positive appearance and a passionate delivery, make you sound exciting. So anything you say is fine, as long as it’s
not a complaint, something unpleasant, or rude. If the first words out of your mouth are a
complaint – BAM – people label you a complainer. Why? Because if you’re speaking to a new acquaintance,
that complaint is his 100% sampling of you so far. So make sure the first words out of your mouth
are nothing unpleasant. Anything else works, no matter how boring. Just add some excitement to it. Technique number three: BECOME A MODERN DAY RENAISSANCE MAN The term “Renaissance man” is often applied
to people who seek to develop their abilities in all areas of accomplishment. A great example would be Leonardo Da Vinci,
whose area of expertise ranged from science to art. If you want to become a social expert, you
need to have knowledge related to every imaginable field, not just what you like. If I’m interested in playing the piano, that
doesn’t mean that whenever I meet someone I’ll only talk about the piano. And if I don’t have any interest in boxing,
it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have any knowledge related to it. Let’s say you meet someone new, someone who
loves boxing and won’t shut up about it. If you don’t know anything about the sport,
the conversation will probably end very fast, because you won’t know what questions to ask
your new acquaintance. So every once in a while scramble up your
day and read up on a new subject that you don’t know anything about. You just might learn something interesting,
and more importantly, you’ll have some new material to talk about. “Oh yes, I actually saw that fight. Did you see that right hook K.O.?” Technique number four: ALWAYS HAVE SOMETHING INTERESTING TO SAY When going to a gathering, you naturally plan
your outfit and make sure your shoes will match. And, of course, you must have just the right
tie or correct color lipstick. But wait a minute. Didn’t you forget the most important thing? What about the right conversation to enhance
your image? You will follow your instincts in conversation. But at least be prepared in case inspiration
doesn’t hit. The best way to insure you’re conversationally
in the swing of things, is to listen to a newscast just before you leave. What’s happening in the world right now: all
the fires, floods, stock market crashes, they make great conversational material, no matter
what crowd you’re circulating in. So the last thing you do before you leave
the house is check today’s news. Technique number five: NEVER THE NAKED THANK YOU We use the phrase “thank you” so often that
people don’t even hear it anymore. Very simply, never let “thank you”, stand
naked and alone. Always make it “thank you for something”. When we buy groceries at the store, we flash
a naked thank you at the cashier when they give us back our change. Is that the same “thank you” you want to give
to a loved one who cooks you a delicious dinner? Always dress up your appreciation with a reason: Thank you for helping me with the dishes. Thank you for being such a loyal customer. Thank you for cooking this amazing meal. When thanking someone always think of it as
three words, not two: “thank you for”. And while we’re at it, thank you for watching
till the end. I hope you learned something new today. If you have any other tips or techniques you’d
like to share, do it in the comments below. Together we’ll become better than yesterday.

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